un arc en ciel dans le lavabo

got advice ?

no matter what's going on in the world, this is my own private bubble, so i'm going to talk bubbles.

in real life it is most time easier to get to know people, to predict this or that, there's a body language, a face to look at... but a computer or an iphone is such a wall, a wall as a mask or not, but a wall where it is more difficult to see through. this is poorly said, but you certainly know what i mean.

this blog was a blank canvas, for which i've never tried to "advertise" :  i'm not looking for a big audience, i'm not using anybody for a self-promotion purpose, i'm not trying to work hard on you so you add me to your links, i sell very few stuff in my etsy for which i'm not desperately seeking potential customers either.
and i have a social life in the real world, therefore my computer is not my one & only -- however don't get me wrong, i have a few incredible friends met online, and no doubt our bonds are now beyond an internet connection. it sometimes happens and it feels so good (to trust & be trusted, to love & be loved).
but, and there's a but, i also paid the price for (several) disappointment & deception. and man, they say it hurts and it hurts ! especially when you're gullible & sensitive. because you see, people like me just believe what they're told. they can't imagine how twisted human minds can be, how much opportunism rules the world, or that the people who let grown a i love you friend don't mean it a second (why do they say it then ?!) even after a few years, making someone feel less than nothing in the wink of an eye. because yes, as raw as it sounds, this is not a paranoid shout but a (darker) part of the new virtual reality.

so before i might make the decision to close this little space -- it's been tickling me indeed -- for the hurt is like the rotten apple that spoils the basket, i have a favor to ask to some of the people i may cross roads with or already have :
i'm a what you see is what you get type of girl, on this blog i share honestly & humbly some little bits of my life, the simple things & beauty that i can see around me, record some memories for my daughter to read later...
if you play those games for whatever reason, please don't try to make me feel special, don't try to make me believe you want to be a friend or that i am your friend. there are millions of other souls on the internet, so it's easy to find someone else to play with. don't count me in. we talk about respect.
this heart of mine i'd like to keep it fully & unconditionally open for the people who are worth it, and the friends who i haven't met yet.
i also want to hope that the time i spend here is not pure waste.
and to tell you the truth, the bordeline has become a little blurry lately...